SUBWAY WOOFERY : It ain’t me, babe…
Let me explain something to you… I’m a fucking dog! Do you think I bought a MetroCard and swiped it with my gigantic furry paw? Do you think I wanna be lying on this floor that smells like the urine from at least seven different species? Do you think I wanna be covered in fur when it’s ninety degrees outside? I was on my third post-treat nap of the early afternoon, when my owner bellowed, “It’s such a beautiful day, we should go for a walk!” I knew that sounded like bad news for ol’ Ruffington here so I promptly climbed into my oversized Pet Porter and passed gas…
Next thing I know I’m walking onto a subway car and everyone is starring at me like I’m some mythical creature from an enchanted forrest. Listen here New Yorkers, just because all of your dogs can fit in Louis Vuitton purses doesn’t mean the rest of the country doesn’t hang with big dogs like myself! And before you ask, yes my father was The Beast in the family comedy smash hit The Sandlot. (http://bit.ly/bJy0aX) How else do you think I can afford to live on the Upper East Side?
*** Picture barked in by Brian and originally posted on WestsideIndependent.com! Keep on Douchin’ ***
I snuck Rosie on the subway once. I had no idea it was illegal to do so without a carrier. Thankfully I wasn’t caught, because it’s a $400 fine.
Total crap. If people can brings bikes on the subway, you should be able to bring dogs during off peak hours.
You know. If they’re friendly.
